40x40 Adventure 1 completed: Family participates in a community race or run/walk

The first thing you should know about this whole 40x40 adventure is that I’m starting this endeavor whilst pregnant with my fourth child. Further, I have progressed in my pregnancy past the “glowing, hip-swinging earth mother/goddess” stage and am well into “grouchy and in pain” phase of the game, which I understand that many women never reach, and also those that do get to this, uh, elevated state of pregnancy don’t usually enter it under their third trimester. I’ve been existing--nay, marinating--in this state since about 20 weeks, when I started having to do all the irritating older-preggo tests and simultaneously my hips and pelvic bones started to be angry with me.

And so.

I don’t want to complain (though I’ve been told I’m quite a complainer, though I prefer the term “critically observant”), especially about myself, but I should have picked less physically demanding endeavors for this damn list. I’ve already been working on the 5 million steps thing, but because of the aforementioned hip and pelvic pain, I had slowed waaaaay down on that--from 8k steps/day, to about (on a good day) 5k steps. At about the time my “I’m a waddling mess who can barely move” pity party had set up tables, refreshments, and chosen a caterer (Ben and Jerry’s, natch), my friend Ke’opu posted about putting together a team to do a community walk to raise funds for diabetes awareness, prevention, and treatment. Her late father, whom I had known from work, had had diabetes, and she was walking to honor him. She had done the team organization and all the research; all I had to do is register my family, donate a voluntary amount, and show up with my family.

So I shut my whiny trap and did it, and it was fun, despite my waddling. Of course it was. And mahalo to Ke'opu for the inspiration, motivation, and opportunity!

What I learned:

-Show up early. It’s a good thing it was a walk and not a race, because we couldn’t find parking and so were 20 minutes late and were literally the last people to start.

-You just have to be ahead of the volunteers who are cleaning up in order to still be considered part of the walk.

-It’s nice to walk around Kapi’olani Park on a clear, Saturday morning. Sometimes I forget stuff like that, because Waikiki is starting to be a development wasteland.

-First place and last place both get swag. Last place gets more swag than first because the race organizers don’t have to worry about running out.

-There are lots of different ways to engage with causes and communities, and it’s important to show my family as many as possible.

Would I do it again: Sure!

Status: Success!

40 by 40--one thing i'm doing: declutter challenge!

So I saw on the FBs a declutter challenge:
40 bags in 40 days

And since I've been looking for a declutter challenge, and can count to 40, I decided to pick this one.

I've added a couple categories: toss, donate, recycle, and use. The weirdest one may be use, but here's my thoughts on that: I have a bunch of half-used stuff. Half a bottle of conditioner. Three mostly used ketchups. A face mask sample. A bag full of bath bombs.

Why do I keep these things? If there is a zombie apocolypse, the last thing I'm going to care about is leave-in conditioner. But I don't want to waste it. And the prissy side of me wants to see if it will, indeed, make my hair as lustrous and shiny as it claims. So why wait?

Photos to come. Actually, prolly it will be too, too embarrassing.

40 x 40, domestic edition

On August 19, 2016, I will turn 40. All in all, it's been a pretty good ride. I've had a lot of adventures already, and already live in a wonderful place, so a lot of stuff I've read on other blogs (eg, try sushi, go surfing, bake a cake [for pete's sake!]), I've already done. But in creating this list, I do have a couple limitations--well, three to four of them. Having little children means I had to keep these to-dos kind of close to home, can't spend a ton of money, and have to keep the time commitment manageable (so, a four-week ski and spa trip in Switzerland is a no-go, as is the summer writers' retreat at Neropa).

With those things in mind, here's my list. It's a compilation of adventures, things I haven't because I'm a slacker jerk, plans for the future, and physical challenges. If you want to join in on any/all, let me know!

1. Fly in a hot-air balloon or hang glider.

2. Complete a Spartan Challenge or other mud obstacle course.

3. Perform stand-up comedy.

4. My e-publishing site, MoananuiVoices.com, is up and running, and I have a plan and a direction to make it a full-time job.

5. Force my husband to take a real family vacation.

6. Back to pre-babies size, or healthiest alternative.

7. Try belly dancing, pole dancing, or Bollywood dancing. Go to at least five classes.

8. Complete MUTU system.

9. Sing with the band!

10. Get another tattoo.

11. (Self?) publish a novel.

12. Do something for 100+ days straight.

13. Complete a declutter project.

14. Register to vote.

15. Do six months' worth (180 days) of meat-free eating.

16. Take each kid somewhere overnight.

17. Write one million words of my own stuff.

18. Send presents or whatever to everyone who responded to that FB post that one time.

19. Walk five million steps (my pedometer app has lifetime steps, so this started in November 2014).

20. Complete a Duolingo language.

21. Correspond with someone (who speaks that language) in that language.

22. Help someone's career.

23. Clean out the stuff I have at my mom's house.

24. Start a podcast.

25. Learn and record myself (and friends, hopefully) doing a WilldaBeest choreography.

26. Institute Hawaiian spirituality practice, a la Ku Kahakalau, in my family.

27. Take a martial art.

28. Write a will and figure out kids' custody and whatnot.

29. Buy an ukulele.

30. Read and review 20 non-fiction books.

31. Complete each kid's first year photo album.

32. Zipline!

33. Write a fan letter to Stephen King.

34. Do a pin-up photo shoot.

35. Complete the Kulaiwi DVD series, or other 'olelo Hawai'i language-learning system.

36. Participate as a family in a community race or run/walk.

37. Donate blood.

38. Write a poem in 'olelo Hawai'i.

39. Cook a turducken!

40. Post each of these to my blog.

And one to grow on: Find five new things to do, five places to travel, and five things to accomplish by age 50!

Overanalyzing "Blurred Lines"/"Can't Stop", just like every other damn person

I know I’m about two months late to the conversation, but I don’t think “Blurred Lines” is rapey. The blurred line being referred to isn’t whether consent is given or not, but rather the confusing prospect (for a guy) of an interested woman who is worried about tarnishing her “good girl” image by doing it rough with a guy.

To me, this is the story this song is telling: A guy and a girl know each other, well enough that he knows how her ex treated her. He tells her he thinks they should hook up, and not just hook up but that rough sex is exactly what she seems to want, even if she hasn’t articulated that per se. He encourages her to “get at” him, if she’s as interested as she thinks he is. He tells her she is “far from plastic,” meaning she shouldn’t put up a façade of disinterest. She makes some reference to “getting plastered” (see the chorus). I take this couplet to mean that she is doing the thing where you pretend to be drunker or more stoned or whatever, as an excuse to do what you would otherwise be too afraid to do. At the end of the song, they smoke a joint, and it’s their “beginning.”

Everybody quotes the line “You know you want it,” to illustrate that it’s rapey (as in the male is projecting his desires onto her), but if you take the narrative of the song, I think he is just stating an opinion. After all, she’s sticking around long enough to hear this entire monologue from him, and smoke the J he offers. The music part of a song evokes a club or party—actually, some kind of brightly lit place with people. Even the music video is (nakie ladies aside) rather innocuous: balloons, silliness, the men ogle but don’t touch, the women do the handling of the men, and are naked or mostly so but still seem comfortable and confident. I think people get offended about this song because the man is kind of cocky (see the Slate article that explains it better than I can), but he still gets the girl. The woman in the song enjoys it, wants to hump the kind of guy who offers “something that will tear your ass in two.” We find it repugnant that a guy like that can get the girl, but the @ss wants what the @ss wants.

Now, placing this song in context with the VMA performance, and it’s like Robin Thicke has gotten exactly what he wished for: Miley Cyrus acted the part of a sexually strong woman. But instead of celebrating her expression of sexual confidence, we get mad because she’s not acting like a “good girl.”

Poor Robin Thicke gets blasted because he’s older and should know better—well, yes, but if you watch the video you can see he’s singing and she bends over in front of him and grinds up on him. He looks like he’s being a good sport about it, grinding back politely (the interesting intersection of hip hop culture and Canadians)—he doesn’t grab at her in any way, and just looks like he’s just hitting his marks. He’s a cog in a larger marketing machine.

As for Miley Cyrus, more, uh, nasty (truthfully, I think the whole thing she has going on is gross and tacky) than this persona she has on right now is that her performance was horrible—poor singing, poor dancing, and the usage of black people as props. She is an entertainer, a performer, and to me she scored low on both those accounts. What's difficult is that Miley (as many female entertainers do) has placed her body as the site of provocation, so any commentary on her work necessarily includes commentary on her body. What Miley sings about and the way she performs becomes who she is, whether true or not.

To her credit, she is living exactly as she sings in her song: saying what she wants, doing what she wants, forgetting haters, etc. No difference has been made between free choice and acting irresponsibly and selfishly, or the difference between sexy and sexual, or provocative and tacky. Miley lives at an unfortunate time in history where we have to go to even greater lengths to shock people; in a few years, entertainers will have to perform naked with monkeys and snakes coupling in order to make a dent in people’s consciousness. Her job was to get attention, and she did that effectively, to whatever detriment to her as a person. She is also just a cog in a larger machine, as much as she thinks she is being an individual.

Both these songs are about free choice, but to very different effect. In “Blurred Lines,” it seems like the woman in the song has to get over her internal hangups to embrace her sexuality. In “Can’t Stop,” it’s doing whatever you want, no matter what anyone says. When those two songs meet, they are just dissimilar enough  to become a commentary sex in modern pop culture.

New Wakey Wakey Morning Playlist: About Damn Time!

After about six months listening to the same morning songs, my family staged a revolt. So I got some new songs. If you want to hear it before you buy it, find me on Spotify.

“Hey Mama” – Mat Kearney

“You Make My Dreams” – Hall & Oates

“Gwarn!” – Pato Banton

“Can’t Keep It In” – Cat Stevens

“Why Why Why” – Lightning Seeds

“And She Was” – Talking Heads

“Empty Bottle Collector” – They Might Be Giants

“Now Is The Start” – A Fine Frenzy

“Lovely, Love My Family” – The Roots

“Up Up Up” – Givers

“You Might Think” – The Cars

“Nice ‘N’ Clean” – Chromeo

“That’s Not My Name” – The Tings Tings

Wakey Wakey Lemon Cakey, August 2012

I am a firm believer that the first hour of your day can shape the rest of your day. When I was in high school, my mother would consistently wake me up seven minutes before my alarm was set to go off (which always made me wonder why she bugged me the night before to make sure I set the alarm in the first place) by yelling at me, "Meredith, get up already! Stop lying around."

I would feel irritated, helpless, resentful, and that I had been robbed of free choice--and all day long I'd feel that "I'm running late" panic (even when not actually running late, which was confusing) with an attendant feeling of not knowing what was expected of me. No one needs that kind of anxiousness, which started at 5:30a.m. and ran another 18 hours, five days a week.

Nowadays, I like to wake up to music. I was looking up "morning playlist" online, and found most of them to be sickeningly sweet, where every song includes "good morning," "sunshine," "hello," or some nauseating combination thereof. I am not a morning person, and would punch someone in the face if I had to listen to "Walking on Sunshine," "Good Morning, Starshine," "Good Day, Sunshine," and "Beautiful Day" every damn morning.

On the flip side are the playlists designed to get you out of bed and ready to punch someone in the face--"I'm awake and full of RAAAAGE" playlists, which include such charming ditties as "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor," Metallica's "The Struggle Within," and anything by Korn. These playlists, incidentally, are identical to the ones dudes make when it's chest and shoulder day at the gym.

The third type of playlist is the mellow playlist--so mellow, in fact, as to not actually wake you up. These playlists often include John Meyer, Jason Mraz, Michael Buble, and Carly Simon, unless "You're so Vain" gets you pumped. With a mellow playlist, you wake up tapping your foot, feeling relaxed and cheerful--and realize you're so relaxed because it's already 11:30 and you've slept til lunch.

Here is my current morning playlist, for your consideration. Of course everyone thinks they have great taste in music, but I had to factor in my husband and kids' taste in music, so that is what makes this playlist especially rocking. If you're on Grooveshark, you can find me (mer4ie) and this playlist.

Let me know what your favorite a.m. songs are; we can start a list.
And stop lying around already!

"Ankle Injuries"--Fujiya & Miyagi
"Boogie-Woogie No. 5"--Puffy Ami Yumi
"Break My Stride"--Matthew Wilder
"Call Your Girlfriend"--Robyn
"Come On Eileen"--Save Ferris
"Danza Kuduro"--Don Omar & Lucenzo
"Good Morning Baltimore"--Hairspray soundtrack
"Good Morning Freedom"--Blue Mink
"Grace Kelly"--MIKA
"Hello Seattle"--Owl City
"Hooked on a Feeling"--Blue Swede (and I dare anyone to stay asleep after the "Ooga Chakka ooga chakka")
"Just Can't Get Enough"--Depeche Mode
"L.O.V.E."--V.V. Brown
"Phat Fish"--Pimpbot
"Silly Love Songs"--Wings
"Stuck Like Glue"--Sugarland
"Take On Me"--A-Ha
"Up Up Up"--Givers
"Walking on Sunshine"--Katrina & the Waves (okokok, I love this song)
"Life's a Happy Song"--The Muppets soundtrack

Thoughts while listening to MDNA and Googling

I recently installed Spotify on my laptop, and it told me Madonna came out with a new album, MDNA. As I did for Lana Del Rey, I decided to listen to Madonna's new album in its entirety, with furious Googling and a kind of stream-of-conscience music/personna review.

Let's begin:

-I wish Madonna would stop referring to herself as a girl. If there is any female in the Western world who exists in the fullness of her womanhood, it is Madonna. I mean, really. She's 53. I'm going to relisten to this album and keep a tally.

-Oh wait, I did know Madonna was coming out with a new album. She performed for the Super Bowl. I remember now, because I caught flack on the Facebooks for saying that when I see Madonna perform nowadays, I want to give her a calcium chew and some sensible shoes. My friend John Paul told me that she was moving like that during the half time show because during dress rehearsal she had pulled a muscle or something. I stand (or step mincingly) corrected.

-In "I'm a Sinner," Madonna refers to St. Anthony, St. Sebastian, and other "saints and holy men." I like that she is expanding her Catholic schtick to include more of that religion's pantheon. And Wiki tells me that St. Sebastian is the patron saint of athletes, archers, homosexuals, and, um, the bubonic plague. And that he's commonly shown tied to a post and being shot with arrows--Madonna even mentions arrows. Aha! Now the "Losing My Religion" video makes more sense.

-"Girl Gone Wild." Again, with the girl thing. But more importantly: the mantyhose video! Meggings, mights, male foundation garments. At this point, I can't even hear the song, for the remembrance of that video is filling up my senses like a night in a steamy, homoerotically charged forest.

-Madonna recently did an interview where she talks about how hard it can be to be the single parent of four kids. Four? Someone picked up another accessory baby and didn't send out a press release. It is also surprising that she would play that card, the "I need to connect to my ladies; I'm just like them" gambit. In my opinion, that's below Madonna. I swear, after the Second Lady of the Iron Brassiere, Hilary Clinton, broke down on the campaign trail, crying about the guilt over eating pizza and not being able to find time to take care of herself (I sound dismissive, but I really felt for her), that is the go-to approach for a strong lady looking to connect with a female audience. With Hilary Clinton, you root for her because, let's face it, she looks like someone has made some easy/poor diet choices, but with Madonna, not only does she look like she could break a mountain lion's neck with her thighs, but also she's rich enough that she can hire nannies for each of her kid's appendages. Perhaps I sound anti-Madonna, but really I'm anti-"I'm just like you!" because clearly a celebrity is delusional if they think they can earn seven figures above me and think they are still just like me (hear that, Gwyneth Paltrow?).

-At the end of "Gang Bang," Madonna says, "If you're going to act like a bitch, you're going to die like a bitch." That's not the damn line!

-The First Lady of the Iron Brassiere is Margaret Thatcher. These are designations I have made myself; there is no official First Lady of the Iron Brassiere society, though I would love to see their coat of arms. Madonna could be the Third Lady of the Iron Brassiere.

-I don't want to focus on Madonna's age, but listening to "Gimme All Your Love" ("L-U-V, Madonna!") I was struck how it sounds like a teeny bopper song. Teenage (or younger) singers often get criticized for singing tunes that are too mature for their age; can Madonna be cited for a song that is too immature for her age?

-EW has a small article about the self-referential bits of MDNA ("Some girls are like a virgin..."). Check it out. They may also talk about her videos (eg, how the mantyhose video resembles those for "Express Yourself" and "Vogue").

-There is a heavy cheerleader vibe on this album: "Gimme All Your Love," "Superstar," "Bday Song." How you feel about cheerleaders and their cheering may well affect how you like this album.

-Absolutemadonna.com says that Madonna is 5'4". Doesn't that seem impossible she's so small?

-Naughty girls, sexy time, sinning, Catholicism--done, done, done, and done. So, what's new on this album? Aside from mantyhose. And Nicki Minaj. "Love Spent" talks about how the singer wants her beloved to pay as much attention to her as he does his money (yes, I assume heterosexuality, just because there are a lot of pronouns in the sentence)--and features a banjo. "I Fucked Up" is a sincere musical apology--or not--which has the most Madonna-ness to it. That's about it, I think.

-"If you were the Mona Lisa, you'd be hanging in the Lourve." Somehow, I thought that analogy was going to go in a different direction.

-I think one of the key facets to consider when reviewing Madonna is danceability. That's what she's known for, musically, right? Despite the aggressive percussion and heavy electronic influence, I don't feel this album is particularly danceable (there are a couple tracks where I bob in my chair, but nothing I would classify as a dancefloor killer)--but it's ripe for a kickass remix album (as evidenced by the "Give Me All Your Love" remix at the end of this album).

-Why do we even call them 'albums' anymore?

-Ok, I was too busy to count every instance, but there are over 15 references to Madonna being a "girl."

-To pick up on an a couple earlier points, aside from danceability, what is the level of Madonna-ness on this album? What is Madonna trying to do with album? Is she successful? Do we buy this album because it is Madonna, or because it is awesome? Is this album the next step in her development as an artist? By the title, I figure the theme is something like the parts that make up Madonna, the building blocks of her as an artist. (Or maybe it was just supposed to be catchy.) So, in that sense, with the naughty girl, sexy time, etc. bits, and the self-references (even though that kind of meta, right--that Madonna is made up of bits of Madonna), it's true to the building blocks idea, but having so many blocks, as it were, doesn't leave that much for artist development.

Favorite tracks: I Fucked Up, Girl Gone Wild, I'm a Sinner.

Verdict: I might buy a couple, but no huge iTunes download. 2.85/5 stars

Addendum: An IM convo with Nick Carraway
Nick Carraway [2:50 PM]:　wow, kinda harsh　funny and true points thoMeredith Enos [2:50 PM]:　hm　i wanted to like it but i just didn't　i do love mantyhoseNick Carraway [2:50 PM]:　haha　that's the first time i've heard that term　it makes sense to me though because i am familiar with "moobs"Meredith Enos [2:51 PM]:　and murses?Nick Carraway [2:51 PM]:　it's a European Handbag dammit!Meredith Enos [2:52 PM]:　hee hee hee　i think i might need to write more on artist development. despite the fact that i love madonna, i don't like this album probably because she's had, like, 20 albums already.　shouldn't she have better rhymes? melodies? more mature subject matter?Nick Carraway [2:54 PM]:　agree about the subject matter　i heard an interview from the guy from megadeath　not that i really like that band　but anyway he was saying that it's much harder to create albums as your career goes on　because you have your whole previous life time and experience to create the first album, but the second one has to be cranked out in a much shorter time periodMeredith Enos [2:56 PM]:　hmm　i guess but madonna lives a rich and full life. you'd think she has a lot stuff to write songs aboutNick Carraway [2:57 PM]:　yeah, but has she really faced that much adversity recently　?　like u pointed out, she can't relate to everyday working moms Meredith Enos [2:57 PM]:　there isn't that much difference in this album than, say, miley cyrus or whoever　she did a film about malawiNick Carraway [2:57 PM]:　yeah, n george clooney got arrested in sudan　doesn't mean they're africanMeredith Enos [2:58 PM]:　she could write about world peace, being a strong woman in a man's world, aging, learning, etc.Nick Carraway [2:59 PM]:　or the mystical secrets of kabbalahMeredith Enos [2:59 PM]:　it makes me think about her 24 year old (or whatever) boyfriend: does she think she's getting this guy because she's a cougar, or because she's as appealing in the same way as a 24 year old? you know what i mean?　i would love a song about the kabbalahNick Carraway [3:01 PM]:　agreed.　i dont think she thinks shes a 24 year oldMeredith Enos [3:01 PM]:　but the music feels like something a 24 year old would make. Nick Carraway [3:02 PM]:　it could be her trying to keep up with the ke$ha's and katy perry's of the worldMeredith Enos [3:02 PM]:　so that's my point: is the appeal of madonna that she's just as appealing as a 24 year old, or because she's effin madonna　yep. sadNick Carraway [3:02 PM]:　or it could be her producer just pushing her into the radio popular soundMeredith Enos [3:02 PM]:　
　can't think too well; now i'm listening to the new nicki minaj and it's distracting me.　she repeats herself a lot　i think nicki ran out of lyricsNick Carraway  [3:04 PM]:　I want to hear itMeredith Enos [3:05 PM]:　there's that song on the radio where she just goes "IIIIIIIII" for 16 measures. Girl needs a vacation. Or a thesaurus.yep. also sad.